Kia ora Aggie

How many weeks were you when you found out you were pregnant with Agnes?

About six weeks I think…? I’d not long got my period back since my first pregnancy so didn’t know my cycle yet. It only occurred to me to take a test because that week I’d turned down an Aperol Spritz (my fave) and swapped out a coffee for a hot chocolate - something I hadn’t done since I was last pregnant. When I saw the test was positive, I was a raving lunatic, pacing up and down the hallway repeating “I can’t f***ing believe it, I can’t f***ing believe it!” We weren’t trying to conceive, and we actually weren’t agreeing on when to start trying. We’d recently got married and I was keen to stick with our original plan of starting for #2 straight away as things took a while with our first born, Minnie. After six months of trying, I had a miscarriage at 11.5 weeks and then it took another nine months to conceive (Minnie) after that, so I was worried it might take a while again. Whereas, Hamish was feeling more confident and was keen to hold off for a bit. We ended up reaching a compromise but turns out the decision was already made for us!

Was your second pregnancy much different from your first one with your daughter Minnie?

Physically I was pretty lucky in both pregnancies, mild nausea here and there. And while I was sick a couple of times this time, I didn’t put on nearly as much weight which made things more comfortable. I also didn’t get sciatica which plagued me the first time. I definitely put it down to starting osteopath appointments early (shout out to Lorraine from Better Health Osteopathy, I couldn’t recommend her enough!) Mentally it was quite different though, first time I loved every aspect of pregnancy… I was relentlessly positive. But this time I just didn’t enjoy it as much… possibly because I didn’t have the time to, having a toddler keeps you busyyyy and the nine months just flew by!

What made you decide to have a home birth? 

I was adamant I was going to have a different birth this time. Minnie’s emergency c section birth was your typical cascade of interventions. So this time round, I ditched the obstetrician and found a new, amazing midwife who supported me 100% and empowered me to have the birth I knew I could have. The two experiences could not be more different. There are so many variables when giving birth (and a bit of luck, too), so finding the right midwife that aligns with your values, outlook and the kind of birth you’re hoping for is so important. 

Fun fact: If you birth at home, your child will have their birth suburb as the location on their birth certificate / passport. Whereas if you birth in hospital, they’ll have the city name.

Not so fun fact: Christchurch hospital has one of the highest c section rates in NZ, if not the highest. Just by choosing to birth there, your chance of having an unplanned c-section increases by 40-50%. 

Tell us when your labour started and how the process from beginning of labour to end went.

I was just in the middle of confirming a nice high tea for myself and some girlfriends for the following day when I felt like I peed myself. My waters didn’t break the first time so I didn’t know what to expect.

It had been a searing 35 degree day, one of the hottest of all summer. I’d spent the afternoon at the Botanical gardens pool with my toddler who absolutely ran me ragged, and I’d even thought to myself - if this doesn’t send me onto labour, I don’t know what will! 

It took me a while (and a few more obvious gushes) to believe it was happening. Still hoping to make my high tea, I even googled to see how long labour might typically start after waters breaking, which led me to believe I had time up my sleeve. But things moved pretty quickly from my waters breaking around 8pm. Having fallen asleep in our daughter’s room, my husband emerged about 10pm and I was already starting to have light contractions. I sent him back to bed to rest up and paced around until midnight when the pain really started to kick in and I started timing my contractions. At 3am I couldn’t bear to be alone anymore and so I called my mum who lives across the street. At 4am I called my midwife to come and woke up my husband, who started to set up the birth pool and twinkly lights etc.. At 5am I was in the birth pool, and at 7am Aggie was born (on her due date)!

What methods of pain management for labour did you use?

No medication. I tried different techniques that I last minute swatted on from a book both my midwife and sister recommended, Juju Sundin’s Birth Skills with Sarah Murdoch. My husband had post-it note excerpts from it stuck to our bedroom mirror to refer to if needed. The book talks about healthy pain, and my husband had himself a t-shirt made with “Healthy pain” across it which I thought was hilarious, but actually super helpful in the moment. I did my best to breathe and not swear (too much) through the contractions, distracting myself with marching and stomping. And once I was in the pool, my midwife gave me some sharp wooden pressure balls (I had impressions in the palms of my hands for days afterward) which I squeezed the shit out of. Those and my magical fairy lights, I really couldn’t have done without!

How was your experience with your midwife?

Amazing. I honestly have no words. Worlds apart from my first experience. It reinforced to me how important your team is. Don’t underestimate how important this is, and if the rapport doesn’t feel right, no matter where you are in the nine month journey - change! Listen to your intuition and do what’s right for you.